Need to be inspired again...

So here I am at work, feeling kind of pressured and demoralized. Linda, the accountant/invoicing/phones is on the verge of tears. Ok. She cried. Fair enough. After working Saturday, Sunday and now the pressure is just getting to her. I feel pressured but I'll NEVER shed a tear for work. The point is that I am fairly uninspired and largely demoralized at this point of time. I just read Imagine FX (Concept Art) magazine and it really seems that I should be doing more of that than this monotonous crunching of product in and invoices. I wonder too that if I stay out of the industry too long, it is all going to be a case of too little too late when I finally have enough money to pursue my dream career. My dear friend Louise flew down from Sydney to visit me over the weekend and it was wonderful. Just having someone to share my couch and make me a coffee gave me a sort of glowing feeling. We did lots of other things in Wellington too and had a great time together. Yet, she did mention that I had somewhat changed. A bit darker and edgier than I was back in Auckland just about a year ago. I do admit that could be true. There is a bitter sense of frustration with life. Simply put, I'm just living a day at a time, grinding through it, expecting nothing good to happen and hoping nothing bad would. And I'm not sure what the answer is here. Be content with an "it-could-be-worse" life? Do the same thing each day and hope for a lucky break? Or should I, with careless abandon, just go back to being an artist with the possibility of ending up broke by the time I reach 40? Would it be better to do a boring but safe job and doing what I love at night/freelance/on the side/as a hobby? I don't know. I really don't.