Cold...

So cold today. Raining during winter and my heater just doesn't seem enough. So cold that I felt a bit sick. I didn't even want to go to the supermarket for weekly grocery reload but am glad I did. Felt like I woke up frozen, and then spent the entire day trying to warm up. I skipped Mass again. This is my third week (or was it forth) that I didn't go. I simply hate winter. All that bitter cold, rain and isolation. Yes, isolation. I haven't got the kind of friends that I have back in Singapore and I suppose I am living much like a hermit. It is so freaking cold anyway so who wants to go out? I am currently feeling really run down by work and perhap life in general. Gosh it has been so long since I had a "winning" feeling. I often wonder what I am doing stumbling through life now. I am basically just trying to get through each day. Winter blues? Perhaps. I guess I have to keep trying and be a little more patient. I do wish I wasn't so alone though. Most of the time it is just 4 walls and me. Do I miss home? Yeah, sure. Should I come back? I dunno. There is much to think about. I do feel I have been missing out really. Missing friends getting together. Missing friends tying the knot, having a baby and for some, simply having a beer together. Honestly, I dread turning the big 3-0 sucking a beer alone in front of the TV but it seems like that is likely to happen. Tough up I guess. Well, I tried to do some creative work today and made myself a planet following an ImagineFX (Concept art magazine) tutorial. Here it is: While I was doing it, I felt just like an Alien trying to return to his home planet. But a lot has changed and perhaps home isn't the same anymore. Ooh, pretty planet...