So... what is new? Not much sadly. Work sucks as usual and I guess the only reason I am still around is because of my sense of duty. I guess I have made up my mind to leave already and the resignation letter has already been logged. Still open though. No date has been set yet for the last day. I submitted my passport photos so that I will have a valid passport when I go home. The original was a bit boring, so I "Warholed" them (see above). Man, I saw that it was Joe's b'day on fb and he is 32. 32! And I will soon be the same. If life is basketball, we would be in the 2nd quarter now. So here I am, still feeling erm... less than 32 but at the back of my mind, I'm in the slow class. Married? No. Kids? No? Career? Quitting soon. Friends? Not too many in NZ. Money? Not enough.
Then worry seeps into my life again. I've stopped drinking because it is an expensive vice, so I feel every brick life throws at me. There are many "what-ifs". What if I am not used to living with my parents after so many years of independence? What if I can't get used to the crowds and awful behaviour of Singaporeans (Sad to say, Kiwis have better social graces)? What if I don't find a job before my savings run out? What if indeed...
It is a really beautiful day outside today. One of NZ's finest. Sun is shining and not too hot either. I feel like a mortal shell of a person now. This is NOT life I tell myself. Going to work, going home to my PS3 and then repeat (Mass Effect 3 is awesome save the ending btw).
Just look at this equation:
Let X be what you need to endure daily to survive.
and Y be what you are doing to make your life meaningful.
If X is far exceeds Y (i.e. What you need to endure daily to survive > what you are doing to make your life meaningful), then it is time to make a change. Simplified, if survive > live, then we need to find more reasons to live or we find ourselves at a point whereby we are keeping ourselves alive, but we aren't really living. Balance is the goal. Alternatively, you can remove some of the BS you need to endure; e.g. cut down your work hours to have more quality of life...
So... what is new? Not much sadly. Work sucks as usual and I guess the only reason I am still around is because of my sense of duty. I guess I have made up my mind to leave already and the resignation letter has already been logged. Still open though. No date has been set yet for the last day. I submitted my passport photos so that I will have a valid passport when I go home. The original was a bit boring, so I "Warholed" them (see above). Man, I saw that it was Joe's b'day on fb and he is 32. 32! And I will soon be the same. If life is basketball, we would be in the 2nd quarter now. So here I am, still feeling erm... less than 32 but at the back of my mind, I'm in the slow class. Married? No. Kids? No? Career? Quitting soon. Friends? Not too many in NZ. Money? Not enough.
Then worry seeps into my life again. I've stopped drinking because it is an expensive vice, so I feel every brick life throws at me. There are many "what-ifs". What if I am not used to living with my parents after so many years of independence? What if I can't get used to the crowds and awful behaviour of Singaporeans (Sad to say, Kiwis have better social graces)? What if I don't find a job before my savings run out? What if indeed...
It is a really beautiful day outside today. One of NZ's finest. Sun is shining and not too hot either. I feel like a mortal shell of a person now. This is NOT life I tell myself. Going to work, going home to my PS3 and then repeat (Mass Effect 3 is awesome save the ending btw).
Just look at this equation:
Let X be what you need to endure daily to survive.
and Y be what you are doing to make your life meaningful.
If X is far exceeds Y (i.e. What you need to endure daily to survive > what you are doing to make your life meaningful), then it is time to make a change. Simplified, if survive > live, then we need to find more reasons to live or we find ourselves at a point whereby we are keeping ourselves alive, but we aren't really living. Balance is the goal. Alternatively, you can remove some of the BS you need to endure; e.g. cut down your work hours to have more quality of life...
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