A gambler's mentality

Hmm. It is a rainy Monday and it has been a weekend that will change my life. Just put down a deposit for a property in Malaysia and honestly, in spite of all the research done previously, I still feel really overwhelmed. I'm not the one paying for it up front - mum is - with her retirement fund. And I do feel the pressure should this investment go south. The other way to look at it is that if we don't do this now, we won't get to buy anything like this in five years time. I feel like I have fallen short - I should have been able to do this myself, without relying on mum's help. But whatever has happened or did not go my way has already happened. I keep telling myself that a few things go right for me, and I'll be back on track again. Very much a gambler's mentality no? And worse still, I'm gambling with mum's retirement fund. Ah... to work now, where I have more dragons to slay.