Be that someone who is ready to receive that "something"

Self reflection. You know, just like any exercise or diet routine, it feels good the first few days and then the motivation starts to die off. Why? Because deep down, there must be something that compels you, or else your initial rational thoughts will simply be forgotten and your discipline no more. This "something" can be a girlfriend, someone you don't want to let down, a rival that you don't want to lose to, or perhaps even a negative place you have been to that you never want to return to. I am 34 going to 35 now. LKY became our leader at that age. I am still struggling to find a job. Will I succeed? I don't know. Can I? Yes, for sure. How do I do it? I guess I need to improve one day at a time till I eventually have something to hold onto. If you don't have that "something" in life, you can do one of two things. 1) You give up. Say "What's the point?" and then embark on a downward spiral of depression until you die. 2) You can be aspire to be that someone who is ready to receive that "something". The choice is obvious but ever so easily forgotten.

So... Continuing from yesterday

1. What went well?

•  I felt a lot more in control of my situation after my plan
• Shamyl inquired if I could do some Zbrush work for him. It is still preliminary but I haven't really been asked before. Honored.
•  I felt productive yesterday because I had a plan.

2. What went wrong?

• I didn't feel tired enough to sleep. Damn sleepy now.
• I was discouraged when my father kept telling me to give up my dream.
• I felt really "poor" and I am sick of this.

3. How could you do TODAY to make it better?

• Continue planning (1 day.1 week. Then one month) 
• Ignore whatever the critics say. It is your life and you run it. Be responsible.
• Work harder at getting a job. Do that little extra to give yourself a chance.

4. Gratitude.

• I am grateful that I managed to do a little of what I loved yesterday. 
• I am grateful that I am getting a bit of encouragement from my work. It gives me the motivation to press on.
• I am thankful to have this time alone to reflect.